忘记post了 我的博客已换去 glorioushamartia.wordpress.com
2014年6月5日星期四
2014年5月5日星期一
兩日見聞·遊記
一天下馬六甲，一天繞首都趴趴走，是相當累的行程～
馬六甲的炎熱快讓我融化，商業化的雞場街和我以前去的時候一樣，除了紀念品就是外國人，所以說不上好玩，頂多又是一個消費場所。要認識當地人的文化，看一看大街小巷就可以感受得到，不需要去一個圈養區。
所剩無幾的老店鋪，不知道有沒有人傳承。它們在現代化的商店當中顯得冷清和不起眼。
我想，一個旅途並不是硬性規定要把清單上的‘必看、必吃、必做’都完成打勾，所以去馬六甲雖然也沒有特別嘗試什麼菜餚和參觀多少景點，卻相當的順心。
路上發生了不少小插曲，包括收到泊車罰單和追火車戲碼（車長您太善良了！！），入夜時的火車奔向首都，我們在舊式車廂中和外國夫婦面面相覷，時不時三個人聊天、發呆。
經過其中一個站點時，我望著窗外陌生又無比熟悉的建築，心裡似乎有一點想要波濤洶湧，最後還是無疾而終。
想嘆也嘆不出，鬱悶。
同學說，下次玩的時候真的要做好規劃。我在出發前早已做了研究，有一套計劃。可是一夥人一塊出門，每個人都有自己的意見，又不是旅行團，所謂計劃很難實施。加上大家都略顯慵懶，不是特別嚮往看什麼歷史景點～～（馬六甲古蹟區素質還有待提升……）
最讓我們開心的是彼此的陪伴，談學院、談愛情、談動漫、談一些亂七八糟的話題……
晚上和我的bff回去她的宿舍睡覺～
可是我們從輕快鐵轉公車時，在公車站等到頭髮發白，因為司機被困在車龍裡。
公車好不容易到了，結果又是一輪的困在車龍=_=
本來10分鐘的車程，當晚一共費了1小時才到站……
我們雖然困得不耐煩，但幸運的是在上車時就有座位。
覺得公車司機蠻可憐的，也同情那些站著的朋友……
半途中，有很多外勞上車。我這兩天沒少看見馬來西亞公眾對外勞投出的不屑眼神。外勞人數確實激增了，但這不代表我們有權利歧視他們。
辛勤工作的人們，只為求溫飽，難道在異地生存也是一種錯嗎？
要生氣、要不屑，矛頭應該對向政府。
政府的寬鬆政策，不僅置外勞於國人的指責當中，也讓國人產生了隱憂和警惕。
這根本就不是一個善待其人民和外國勞工的政權。
------------------------------
第二天在KL走走，我們拿著GPS一開始越走越亂（我們的司機同學是KL人可是他也不認路），後來學會估計路段長度之後，才停止我們的一番亂遊。
仔細想想，我這輩子還真沒去過中央市場，那裡是個寶地呀。特別喜歡的波西米亞風格裙子和長褲向我招手，可惜我荷包無法負擔。
小眾品牌有時比名牌更好看呢。
下午去看《風起了》，沒想過自己有機會欣賞宮老的最後一部作品，機會難得。全馬只有吉隆坡的四間戲院播映。
從中央市場走出來的時候，我們其實只有20分鐘的時間趕去戲院。合作無間的我們，兩個人衝上去買票，駕車的同學快點找車位。
趕到氣喘吁籲，我告訴他們不用那麼急，廣告時間很長（經驗、經驗）。
結果我們入座後足足等了15分鐘左右，廣告才停止。
坐在第一排，是人生中的第一次，雖然角度不好，但電影很精彩，能說是彌補了位置帶來的不方便。（聽說搶票很難，就連預訂也不保證能夠坐第二排，所以應該要感恩了吧？
好吧，我又有感想了，反正我覺得戲院商業化到令人作嘔的地步，明明知道第一排根本不適合給觀眾看電影，硬是要利用那一點的位置。廣告數量也是我所看的場次中最多的，太恐怖了。Pavilion的GSC真心讓我印象不佳，我覺得還是自家附近setia city mall的戲院舒服多了。
吉隆坡是個發展中的城市，但要知道一個城市的最終勝利，不在於有多少的工程和投資，而是有能力讓居住者感到自在。我們不要住戶適應城市，而要讓城市適合居住。
馬六甲的炎熱快讓我融化，商業化的雞場街和我以前去的時候一樣，除了紀念品就是外國人，所以說不上好玩，頂多又是一個消費場所。要認識當地人的文化，看一看大街小巷就可以感受得到，不需要去一個圈養區。
所剩無幾的老店鋪，不知道有沒有人傳承。它們在現代化的商店當中顯得冷清和不起眼。
我想，一個旅途並不是硬性規定要把清單上的‘必看、必吃、必做’都完成打勾，所以去馬六甲雖然也沒有特別嘗試什麼菜餚和參觀多少景點，卻相當的順心。
路上發生了不少小插曲，包括收到泊車罰單和追火車戲碼（車長您太善良了！！），入夜時的火車奔向首都，我們在舊式車廂中和外國夫婦面面相覷，時不時三個人聊天、發呆。
經過其中一個站點時，我望著窗外陌生又無比熟悉的建築，心裡似乎有一點想要波濤洶湧，最後還是無疾而終。
想嘆也嘆不出，鬱悶。
同學說，下次玩的時候真的要做好規劃。我在出發前早已做了研究，有一套計劃。可是一夥人一塊出門，每個人都有自己的意見，又不是旅行團，所謂計劃很難實施。加上大家都略顯慵懶，不是特別嚮往看什麼歷史景點～～（馬六甲古蹟區素質還有待提升……）
最讓我們開心的是彼此的陪伴，談學院、談愛情、談動漫、談一些亂七八糟的話題……
晚上和我的bff回去她的宿舍睡覺～
可是我們從輕快鐵轉公車時，在公車站等到頭髮發白，因為司機被困在車龍裡。
公車好不容易到了，結果又是一輪的困在車龍=_=
本來10分鐘的車程，當晚一共費了1小時才到站……
我們雖然困得不耐煩，但幸運的是在上車時就有座位。
覺得公車司機蠻可憐的，也同情那些站著的朋友……
半途中，有很多外勞上車。我這兩天沒少看見馬來西亞公眾對外勞投出的不屑眼神。外勞人數確實激增了，但這不代表我們有權利歧視他們。
辛勤工作的人們，只為求溫飽，難道在異地生存也是一種錯嗎？
要生氣、要不屑，矛頭應該對向政府。
政府的寬鬆政策，不僅置外勞於國人的指責當中，也讓國人產生了隱憂和警惕。
這根本就不是一個善待其人民和外國勞工的政權。
------------------------------
第二天在KL走走，我們拿著GPS一開始越走越亂（我們的司機同學是KL人可是他也不認路），後來學會估計路段長度之後，才停止我們的一番亂遊。
仔細想想，我這輩子還真沒去過中央市場，那裡是個寶地呀。特別喜歡的波西米亞風格裙子和長褲向我招手，可惜我荷包無法負擔。
小眾品牌有時比名牌更好看呢。
下午去看《風起了》，沒想過自己有機會欣賞宮老的最後一部作品，機會難得。全馬只有吉隆坡的四間戲院播映。
從中央市場走出來的時候，我們其實只有20分鐘的時間趕去戲院。合作無間的我們，兩個人衝上去買票，駕車的同學快點找車位。
趕到氣喘吁籲，我告訴他們不用那麼急，廣告時間很長（經驗、經驗）。
結果我們入座後足足等了15分鐘左右，廣告才停止。
坐在第一排，是人生中的第一次，雖然角度不好，但電影很精彩，能說是彌補了位置帶來的不方便。（聽說搶票很難，就連預訂也不保證能夠坐第二排，所以應該要感恩了吧？
好吧，我又有感想了，反正我覺得戲院商業化到令人作嘔的地步，明明知道第一排根本不適合給觀眾看電影，硬是要利用那一點的位置。廣告數量也是我所看的場次中最多的，太恐怖了。Pavilion的GSC真心讓我印象不佳，我覺得還是自家附近setia city mall的戲院舒服多了。
吉隆坡是個發展中的城市，但要知道一個城市的最終勝利，不在於有多少的工程和投資，而是有能力讓居住者感到自在。我們不要住戶適應城市，而要讓城市適合居住。
2014年4月26日星期六
多事之秋
【充实感】
今天蛮疲累的，读了那么多数学，也终于考完两个科目。
在面子书上，我的朋友一举成名（因为他丢失的学生证被别人公告天下哈哈
我和另三个同学在安排马六甲+KL游玩事宜
稍早和international affairs advisor讨论过，决定接受推荐，明年去中国留学一学期
【那些让我学会不回头的人】
包括曾经以玩弄别人感情为乐的某人
其实，同学，我没有什么想要和你说的
对你也没有了任何负面情感
不知道该把你当作朋友还是陌路人
所以你联络我的时候我还是挺挣扎的
我应该以礼相待，或视若无睹？
有些人事物回不到从前
既然当初学不会珍惜，后悔的时候就不要奢求别人谅解
这是很公道的，不是吗？
还有一些和我渐行渐远的朋友，我明白一些事情的改变是不能怨谁的
生而在世，与琳琅满目的人类邂逅相知，但不能保证不分道扬镳
换一个成熟的态度去接受和面对，毕竟我们再也不是小孩子
祝你们一切安好
【那个我想要紧握和珍惜的人】
我很喜欢你，真的。
只是我们不够了解对方，度日如年的心情让人觉得靠近一点是那么的困难
无论如何，在还没得到你的回复之前
我会一直的努力下去
先爱自己多一点，不但可以避免因患得患失、操之过急而失去一个人，还能让别人更加欣赏你的闪光点
愿意为一个人付出，让对方感受到真诚，才能走得长久
幸福，要靠自己争取。
今天蛮疲累的，读了那么多数学，也终于考完两个科目。
在面子书上，我的朋友一举成名（因为他丢失的学生证被别人公告天下哈哈
我和另三个同学在安排马六甲+KL游玩事宜
稍早和international affairs advisor讨论过，决定接受推荐，明年去中国留学一学期
【那些让我学会不回头的人】
包括曾经以玩弄别人感情为乐的某人
其实，同学，我没有什么想要和你说的
对你也没有了任何负面情感
不知道该把你当作朋友还是陌路人
所以你联络我的时候我还是挺挣扎的
我应该以礼相待，或视若无睹？
有些人事物回不到从前
既然当初学不会珍惜，后悔的时候就不要奢求别人谅解
这是很公道的，不是吗？
还有一些和我渐行渐远的朋友，我明白一些事情的改变是不能怨谁的
生而在世，与琳琅满目的人类邂逅相知，但不能保证不分道扬镳
换一个成熟的态度去接受和面对，毕竟我们再也不是小孩子
祝你们一切安好
【那个我想要紧握和珍惜的人】
我很喜欢你，真的。
只是我们不够了解对方，度日如年的心情让人觉得靠近一点是那么的困难
无论如何，在还没得到你的回复之前
我会一直的努力下去
先爱自己多一点，不但可以避免因患得患失、操之过急而失去一个人，还能让别人更加欣赏你的闪光点
愿意为一个人付出，让对方感受到真诚，才能走得长久
幸福，要靠自己争取。
2014年4月24日星期四
Groupwork =trouble =ranting
I really do not understand why people don't do their work.
Although this time my groupmates are better in a way that they took the initiative to conduct meetings, but what is the use of meeting when you don't even want to make progress/discuss something substantial?
Fck it, everytime I am the one who search for information, and when I post in google doc nobody gives a damn, like it's natural they should be doing nothing and leave it all to me.
It's okay if you don't do the research, but at least try to understand what I have written.
Now they start to panic last minute, and go into a mess about who's talking on what topic and also the ppt presentation.
Seems like no one can volunteer to do a simple ppt for the group. Even those (okay, that's actually a particular individual whom I really dislike) who have not contributed at all.
You know, this is a group of 6-7 people, and it is so unfair that only a few people really care about what is going on.
So in the end I was the one reading everyone's assigned essays. I trust myself more, sadly speaking.
I am very tired right now. Halfway doing calculus questions but have to come back and finish off this phil class preparation.
You think this is your death week? Be considerate. I am also suffering, and you should never leave everything to me.
The worst thing is to tell me to chill. I want a good performance. I'm not going to slack okay.
Fck.
Although this time my groupmates are better in a way that they took the initiative to conduct meetings, but what is the use of meeting when you don't even want to make progress/discuss something substantial?
Fck it, everytime I am the one who search for information, and when I post in google doc nobody gives a damn, like it's natural they should be doing nothing and leave it all to me.
It's okay if you don't do the research, but at least try to understand what I have written.
Now they start to panic last minute, and go into a mess about who's talking on what topic and also the ppt presentation.
Seems like no one can volunteer to do a simple ppt for the group. Even those (okay, that's actually a particular individual whom I really dislike) who have not contributed at all.
You know, this is a group of 6-7 people, and it is so unfair that only a few people really care about what is going on.
So in the end I was the one reading everyone's assigned essays. I trust myself more, sadly speaking.
I am very tired right now. Halfway doing calculus questions but have to come back and finish off this phil class preparation.
You think this is your death week? Be considerate. I am also suffering, and you should never leave everything to me.
The worst thing is to tell me to chill. I want a good performance. I'm not going to slack okay.
Fck.
2014年4月19日星期六
碎语
`自作聪明
一些很简单的理论，经过一些人的故弄玄虚变得生涩难懂。
这根本就不是追求智慧的表现，而且也让群组讨论变得很辛苦。
真不明白这些自以为是的人求的到底是什么。
`成长
成长就是能够容忍比你不足的人，并且平等的对待他们。
`负担
为了体现所谓的‘团队精神’，有时你必须承受很多的不公平。
这周是'death week',很多平时摇脚的同学已经一个头两个大，偏偏又遇上group work，所以只能由群组里比较‘闲’的人（比如，我）来承担所有的工作量。
我倒不介意，毕竟获益的是自己。
没办法，大家的习惯和步伐都不同，追求公平只是枉然，接受吧。
`追逐
想要接近一个智商和外貌都比自己优秀的人。
可是总是力不从心，想要靠近他，却又感觉相隔千山万水。
现在能做的，就是尽量保持独立，不要让特定的一人成为自己的重心。
不然，会觉得自己一文不值。
一些很简单的理论，经过一些人的故弄玄虚变得生涩难懂。
这根本就不是追求智慧的表现，而且也让群组讨论变得很辛苦。
真不明白这些自以为是的人求的到底是什么。
`成长
成长就是能够容忍比你不足的人，并且平等的对待他们。
`负担
为了体现所谓的‘团队精神’，有时你必须承受很多的不公平。
这周是'death week',很多平时摇脚的同学已经一个头两个大，偏偏又遇上group work，所以只能由群组里比较‘闲’的人（比如，我）来承担所有的工作量。
我倒不介意，毕竟获益的是自己。
没办法，大家的习惯和步伐都不同，追求公平只是枉然，接受吧。
`追逐
想要接近一个智商和外貌都比自己优秀的人。
可是总是力不从心，想要靠近他，却又感觉相隔千山万水。
现在能做的，就是尽量保持独立，不要让特定的一人成为自己的重心。
不然，会觉得自己一文不值。
2014年4月18日星期五
0416-0418
音乐
越来越觉得自己是交响乐团家庭的一份子，尤其看见很多新人涌入的时候，更有一种‘一定要把我们的社团壮大’的感觉。
星期三和旧、新成员们一起练习，我们也多了一些乐器演奏者，比如法国号和低音提琴，而且他们特别会融入大环境，第一天练习就很顺手～
有了这样积极的环境，真心希望大家都能继续参与每星期的练习。
至于本人的strings section，我真的应努力去提升自己，这样组员面对什么问题的时候，我才能给予建设性的建议。
赶工
沮丧的是，明明是自己的major，可是连一个term paper也写得乱七八糟。
这几天都在日夜赶工，只为在今天交上作业。
虽然很难过，加上哲学课mid term的成绩很不如意，但是想想看，有了这些的失败，才知道下学期要往哪方面施力。
需要读很多很多的论文和材料，英文也要加强。
生命里的错过，有时连弥补的机会都没有。错过了这个学期的IR课，没有发挥到最好，就没有机会重来。
依赖
重心不稳的人需要抓住救命稻草，可是救命稻草难道不也是下一个危机和崩解的预示吗？
能够依赖的只有自己，这是大部分时间里的情况。
没有人能够将你从你那浑浊的思想中解救出来，我也没有那个耐心。
好自为之吧，上天给了你那么多，你为何还要斤斤计较。
很多路的形成都是由太多不可知的外力形成的，并不是你想象的——只要你愿意它就会随你意的进展。
越来越觉得自己是交响乐团家庭的一份子，尤其看见很多新人涌入的时候，更有一种‘一定要把我们的社团壮大’的感觉。
星期三和旧、新成员们一起练习，我们也多了一些乐器演奏者，比如法国号和低音提琴，而且他们特别会融入大环境，第一天练习就很顺手～
有了这样积极的环境，真心希望大家都能继续参与每星期的练习。
至于本人的strings section，我真的应努力去提升自己，这样组员面对什么问题的时候，我才能给予建设性的建议。
赶工
沮丧的是，明明是自己的major，可是连一个term paper也写得乱七八糟。
这几天都在日夜赶工，只为在今天交上作业。
虽然很难过，加上哲学课mid term的成绩很不如意，但是想想看，有了这些的失败，才知道下学期要往哪方面施力。
需要读很多很多的论文和材料，英文也要加强。
生命里的错过，有时连弥补的机会都没有。错过了这个学期的IR课，没有发挥到最好，就没有机会重来。
依赖
重心不稳的人需要抓住救命稻草，可是救命稻草难道不也是下一个危机和崩解的预示吗？
能够依赖的只有自己，这是大部分时间里的情况。
没有人能够将你从你那浑浊的思想中解救出来，我也没有那个耐心。
好自为之吧，上天给了你那么多，你为何还要斤斤计较。
很多路的形成都是由太多不可知的外力形成的，并不是你想象的——只要你愿意它就会随你意的进展。
2014年4月10日星期四
Quiet life
Joining a lot of activities recently, life is busy, but I feel that it is quiet at the same time.
Maybe I have reduced time to be with my friends, but it's still okay, I like what I am doing now.
Fell sick today but went through two horrible tests. Calculus, I screwed it up.
Have to admit the fact that some people are just better in problem solving. Math isn't my strength.
I should improve my writing and speaking skills now. The latter has seen huge progress after going through philosophy and international relations class.
Attended the peer support group meeting yesterday, but felt extremely uncomfortable in that group. I would give it a try for a few more times, but if that isn't working I'm going to switch to another day/session. The problem isn't the content, but the people. There was this over assertive girl who made the session her own little playground and this is what I dislike most. People who look like they are all good and positive but they are not really so. How could you fail to be attentive to your group member's speech when you are devoting yourself to a peer counselling and discussion session?
Some people should learn to listen. That is the basic of counselling. Don't talk so much about yourself, people will soon be tired of listening about you, you, and you.
Maybe I have reduced time to be with my friends, but it's still okay, I like what I am doing now.
Fell sick today but went through two horrible tests. Calculus, I screwed it up.
Have to admit the fact that some people are just better in problem solving. Math isn't my strength.
I should improve my writing and speaking skills now. The latter has seen huge progress after going through philosophy and international relations class.
Attended the peer support group meeting yesterday, but felt extremely uncomfortable in that group. I would give it a try for a few more times, but if that isn't working I'm going to switch to another day/session. The problem isn't the content, but the people. There was this over assertive girl who made the session her own little playground and this is what I dislike most. People who look like they are all good and positive but they are not really so. How could you fail to be attentive to your group member's speech when you are devoting yourself to a peer counselling and discussion session?
Some people should learn to listen. That is the basic of counselling. Don't talk so much about yourself, people will soon be tired of listening about you, you, and you.
2014年4月2日星期三
Sigh
Although waking up in the midnight doing stuff is just too miserable but I have managed to finish everything in one hour.
Should not be angry because I have to handle a mess.
We cannot control what others impose on us but we can choose to be at peace with it.
After venting in a blogpost prior to my work, I decided to take that post down.
I think I would be happier if I just demand myself to do better instead of hoping that the others would follow my steps.
It's not that bad after all. Must get used to solving crises.
No making excuses and blaming other people for a team's failure. They can choose to be indifferent if they want to, but I believe every responsible member will have time to sort out the whole thing. So I have the time, just that I need to put in disproportionate effort. Question yourself on how to optimize rather than doing your part and in the end suffer from a bigger loss.
No use being angry and still have to wipe others' asses.
Cut the front part and give it your best. At least you can answer to yourself.
Others? They will learn their lesson in the future. Don't bother to waste time giving them a lesson.
You have to know that the later a person learns about life's lessons, the more trouble he/she is going to get into.
Should not be angry because I have to handle a mess.
We cannot control what others impose on us but we can choose to be at peace with it.
After venting in a blogpost prior to my work, I decided to take that post down.
I think I would be happier if I just demand myself to do better instead of hoping that the others would follow my steps.
It's not that bad after all. Must get used to solving crises.
No making excuses and blaming other people for a team's failure. They can choose to be indifferent if they want to, but I believe every responsible member will have time to sort out the whole thing. So I have the time, just that I need to put in disproportionate effort. Question yourself on how to optimize rather than doing your part and in the end suffer from a bigger loss.
No use being angry and still have to wipe others' asses.
Cut the front part and give it your best. At least you can answer to yourself.
Others? They will learn their lesson in the future. Don't bother to waste time giving them a lesson.
You have to know that the later a person learns about life's lessons, the more trouble he/she is going to get into.
2014年3月30日星期日
And there are some people that say we shouldn't post RIP.
They want to keep on praying and they think posting RIP is too pessimistic.
But hey, just be rational for a second okay?
I don't know if you are truly feeling bad or just wanting more likes,
but I really dislike your statement.
Even if the plane landed on dry land, do you think there is still hope after more than two weeks of search and rescue?
Have some common sense, please.
Do not think that rational people don't have empathy.
We feel bad too, but you should not be accusing people of being cruel just because we recognize the fact.
So stupid.
But hey, just be rational for a second okay?
I don't know if you are truly feeling bad or just wanting more likes,
but I really dislike your statement.
Even if the plane landed on dry land, do you think there is still hope after more than two weeks of search and rescue?
Have some common sense, please.
Do not think that rational people don't have empathy.
We feel bad too, but you should not be accusing people of being cruel just because we recognize the fact.
So stupid.
2014年3月25日星期二
今天本来想要写一篇自省的文章
可是我很暴躁！！！
整天在神游！！！因为今天凌晨2点爬起来搞报告！！！
他妈的！！！！
结果今天连讲师点名我都没有回应！！！
搞得要我身边的帅哥提醒我！！！糗！！！
帅哥你是好人！！！
然后现在我想睡想到要死
因为刚刚8.30pm才结束乐团练习！！！
组员们你们最好当天要来表演喔！！FFK的话就够力了，我这次破釜沉舟好不好！！！
我很想睡觉！！！！！！
我听见我床的呼唤！！！！
可是我不能睡！！！！！
因为有报告要赶！！！！！
最讨厌群组作业了！！！！
苍天啊啊啊啊！！！！！
整天在神游！！！因为今天凌晨2点爬起来搞报告！！！
他妈的！！！！
结果今天连讲师点名我都没有回应！！！
搞得要我身边的帅哥提醒我！！！糗！！！
帅哥你是好人！！！
然后现在我想睡想到要死
因为刚刚8.30pm才结束乐团练习！！！
组员们你们最好当天要来表演喔！！FFK的话就够力了，我这次破釜沉舟好不好！！！
我很想睡觉！！！！！！
我听见我床的呼唤！！！！
可是我不能睡！！！！！
因为有报告要赶！！！！！
最讨厌群组作业了！！！！
苍天啊啊啊啊！！！！！
Sendiri cipta sendiri syok
这句话就是用来形容我们的教育部的。
我个人不会因为讨厌政府就鄙视MPU课程（对一般人来说，政府规定的课程=没有用，洗脑课）。
第一个学期的MPU课我觉得很值得，因为和政治学有关。
但是这个学期上的课简直就是浪费老子的时间。
我不能理解我们教育部决策者的非凡思维，
为什么硬是要逼迫大专生去读伊斯兰和亚洲文明？
你要么就把中学时期的历史教程编好，要么就少来这些动作。
或许教育部只是嫌一些非政府学校学生读的历史不符合他们想象中 ideal的历史。
好吧既然如此，那我们就让你蹂躏吧，
可起码课本也编得有诚意一点好不好！
美其名曰亚洲文明，
其实根本就没有什么看头。
对于他人文明的缺乏理解和缺乏融会贯通，
导致编者把facts都叠在一起，再推给学生消化。
你expect一个完全不懂中国历史的人知道什么叫做四书五经？
你太他妈逗了。
强迫学生学习，有效吗？
上课的时光多么痛苦，讲师努力教课，学生们却乱成一团。
其实我最主要的投诉重点还是国文课。
教育部expect那些国文基础几乎为零（又或者没有考国文科）的学生被强迫上为期三个月的课程……
然后逼得学生们要投机取巧，
讲师也走回国民型中学金玉其外败絮其中的报告方式，
只求学生把报告搞得美美的，妥妥的，
内容不实也不太紧要。
还强制我们要找很多张照片写报告。
然后上层的官员看见首批学生学习成果丰硕，就在那里sendiri syok。
下课后太累睡着，半夜爬起来赶报告。真是太刺激了。
教育，如果只是浪费学生的时间，
那国家也就没有救了。
我个人不会因为讨厌政府就鄙视MPU课程（对一般人来说，政府规定的课程=没有用，洗脑课）。
第一个学期的MPU课我觉得很值得，因为和政治学有关。
但是这个学期上的课简直就是浪费老子的时间。
我不能理解我们教育部决策者的非凡思维，
为什么硬是要逼迫大专生去读伊斯兰和亚洲文明？
你要么就把中学时期的历史教程编好，要么就少来这些动作。
或许教育部只是嫌一些非政府学校学生读的历史不符合他们想象中 ideal的历史。
好吧既然如此，那我们就让你蹂躏吧，
可起码课本也编得有诚意一点好不好！
美其名曰亚洲文明，
其实根本就没有什么看头。
对于他人文明的缺乏理解和缺乏融会贯通，
导致编者把facts都叠在一起，再推给学生消化。
你expect一个完全不懂中国历史的人知道什么叫做四书五经？
你太他妈逗了。
强迫学生学习，有效吗？
上课的时光多么痛苦，讲师努力教课，学生们却乱成一团。
其实我最主要的投诉重点还是国文课。
教育部expect那些国文基础几乎为零（又或者没有考国文科）的学生被强迫上为期三个月的课程……
然后逼得学生们要投机取巧，
讲师也走回国民型中学金玉其外败絮其中的报告方式，
只求学生把报告搞得美美的，妥妥的，
内容不实也不太紧要。
还强制我们要找很多张照片写报告。
然后上层的官员看见首批学生学习成果丰硕，就在那里sendiri syok。
下课后太累睡着，半夜爬起来赶报告。真是太刺激了。
教育，如果只是浪费学生的时间，
那国家也就没有救了。
2014年3月21日星期五
Rejected
This is only morning time but I received two bad news.
The first one, my scheduled interview with my lecturer for our course assignment had to be cancelled because my group partner was involved in a car accident. (luckily he was safe and sound)
So, when I went to email to check my conversation with my lecturer, and
I found this email from NW uni....
And of course I am being rejected.
To be frank, the few months I spent writing my college essays were really hectic, and tension was always my loyal friend.
I don't think I wrote competent essays, and this feeling of missing out the most decisive moment in life really sucks.
That's why I treat my current courses super-seriously because I don't want to feel like not giving 100% and blaming myself for that later.
(Well, I did put a lot of effort last year into uni application, but maybe the determination and confidence to get into uni just aren't strong enough, plus my credentials are a disadvantage, so I could brace myself for what is going to come in the next few weeks)...
Don't feel like talking about this to any friend except for my gang here in ADP
(especially when all decisions are out)
I think they will probably shrug it off, since they are all going to do transfer anyway.
I know people will give consolation such as, you've done your best, and these decisions are not the end of the world...
Yeah but in the short term rejections purely mean that you've screwed up the applications and you are the one solely responsible for that.
Recognizing this actually makes one feel better.
Think of it, if I really have to do transfer, then I only have around 10 months left to achieve improvement, especially the eloquence in English writing and the maturity of ideas.
The first one, my scheduled interview with my lecturer for our course assignment had to be cancelled because my group partner was involved in a car accident. (luckily he was safe and sound)
So, when I went to email to check my conversation with my lecturer, and
I found this email from NW uni....
And of course I am being rejected.
To be frank, the few months I spent writing my college essays were really hectic, and tension was always my loyal friend.
I don't think I wrote competent essays, and this feeling of missing out the most decisive moment in life really sucks.
That's why I treat my current courses super-seriously because I don't want to feel like not giving 100% and blaming myself for that later.
(Well, I did put a lot of effort last year into uni application, but maybe the determination and confidence to get into uni just aren't strong enough, plus my credentials are a disadvantage, so I could brace myself for what is going to come in the next few weeks)...
Don't feel like talking about this to any friend except for my gang here in ADP
(especially when all decisions are out)
I think they will probably shrug it off, since they are all going to do transfer anyway.
I know people will give consolation such as, you've done your best, and these decisions are not the end of the world...
Yeah but in the short term rejections purely mean that you've screwed up the applications and you are the one solely responsible for that.
Recognizing this actually makes one feel better.
Think of it, if I really have to do transfer, then I only have around 10 months left to achieve improvement, especially the eloquence in English writing and the maturity of ideas.
2014年3月19日星期三
从何说起
最近的心情时好时坏啦
不过很幸运的有很多死党陪着
有吃饭党，有花痴党，有废话党等等
朋友真的炒鸡重要啊
还好我分布在社交、读书和睡觉的时间算是平衡
社交的部分少了一点点
对付出时间比较吝啬
一直觉得自己做的不够
时时刻刻提醒自己FINALS有多么难
尤其当一个学期要应付5个科目（虽然有两个是可以混的）
应该要尽全力去努力
这样即使多么不如意也不会觉得对不起自己（会委屈？）
至于期待，这是个可以让生活灿烂也可以让生活惨淡的词
平淡才是最好的态度
不管是对学业，还是对感情
本来有满腹的话想说
可是等时间过去了又觉得没有抱怨的必要
报告超多的，都想要挂掉了
没什么好更新的
然后我还喜欢上我的同学
结果我朋友帮我查他的时间表
哈哈～我即使掌握了他的行踪也懒的去制造偶遇吧
人家欣赏你，早就会很明显的表现出来
有些事情需要双方的回应
所以还是别自个儿傻傻的去扑空
不过很幸运的有很多死党陪着
有吃饭党，有花痴党，有废话党等等
朋友真的炒鸡重要啊
还好我分布在社交、读书和睡觉的时间算是平衡
社交的部分少了一点点
对付出时间比较吝啬
一直觉得自己做的不够
时时刻刻提醒自己FINALS有多么难
尤其当一个学期要应付5个科目（虽然有两个是可以混的）
应该要尽全力去努力
这样即使多么不如意也不会觉得对不起自己（会委屈？）
至于期待，这是个可以让生活灿烂也可以让生活惨淡的词
平淡才是最好的态度
不管是对学业，还是对感情
本来有满腹的话想说
可是等时间过去了又觉得没有抱怨的必要
报告超多的，都想要挂掉了
没什么好更新的
然后我还喜欢上我的同学
结果我朋友帮我查他的时间表
哈哈～我即使掌握了他的行踪也懒的去制造偶遇吧
人家欣赏你，早就会很明显的表现出来
有些事情需要双方的回应
所以还是别自个儿傻傻的去扑空
2014年3月17日星期一
Defamation
Well, well.
I didn't expect a student so popular and seemed poised to be a leader could do such a thing to my lecturer.
Although I personally do not agree with everything she teaches us, including some bahasa grammar which I am pretty good in, but please give facts and not lies when you want to debate something.
You could well address the fact that her teaching is more exam-orientated and does not really help in improving a student's language proficiency.
But put yourself in her shoes, what could you do better?
It's very hard to teach students with different levels of language proficiency.
If you always come late to class, then perhaps you are not qualified to give any comments though your thoughts might be sound and true.
She isn't 'not teaching' okay.
And I thought based on what you told us privately, you wanted to reflect the fact that it might be hard for some students to learn under this lecturer. (Plus she doesn't explain concisely for better understanding sometimes. Coz the LEVELS OF STUDENTS ARE DIFFERENT!)
Couldn't you just phrase everything nicely?
I really thought that you wanted to help some of our classmates who are struggling to pass this subject. When I first mentioned about long term solutions, you said that the most important thing is for us to tackle the current learning problem.
What you have done is not a solution at all.
Might as well never do it.
Bring real change, not defamation.
I didn't expect a student so popular and seemed poised to be a leader could do such a thing to my lecturer.
Although I personally do not agree with everything she teaches us, including some bahasa grammar which I am pretty good in, but please give facts and not lies when you want to debate something.
You could well address the fact that her teaching is more exam-orientated and does not really help in improving a student's language proficiency.
But put yourself in her shoes, what could you do better?
It's very hard to teach students with different levels of language proficiency.
If you always come late to class, then perhaps you are not qualified to give any comments though your thoughts might be sound and true.
She isn't 'not teaching' okay.
And I thought based on what you told us privately, you wanted to reflect the fact that it might be hard for some students to learn under this lecturer. (Plus she doesn't explain concisely for better understanding sometimes. Coz the LEVELS OF STUDENTS ARE DIFFERENT!)
Couldn't you just phrase everything nicely?
I really thought that you wanted to help some of our classmates who are struggling to pass this subject. When I first mentioned about long term solutions, you said that the most important thing is for us to tackle the current learning problem.
What you have done is not a solution at all.
Might as well never do it.
Bring real change, not defamation.
2014年3月16日星期日
混乱星期日
UMich又发电邮来提醒我，我的申请不被过目，好像是个人资料提交问题= =！
不是都交齐了么哼！
等下他们那里一天亮我就要马上去质问他们了
现在要忙学会的招生表演、数学测验、BM报告等等等
刚刚去bengkel praktikal脚软回家
我觉得我还是不要驾驶比较好，虽然上手很快，但是我很粗心
天阴下雨，一切烦躁的事情也迎面而来
要挺住呀啊
沉住气的一个一个解决掉切勿毛躁
再怎么糟糕也不会糟到哪里去的
顶多不是丢了一些、少了一些东西而已
总会失而复得的
（尤其是针对大学申请，一直很担忧最糟糕的情况来临，不过何必折磨自己呢。即使最后要transfer，也没很差呀，至少还能和我的狐朋狗友混个一年）
数学测验完毕后就是交响乐团的招生活动
这次有点经验，让组员们上台表演
而我们的booth不需要太花俏 :)
把2月用过的布置再拿出来看看能不能利用
星期二就可以看到A同学啦！
你的笑容是对我最大的鼓舞！
天色暗了，是时候回去做事了……
不是都交齐了么哼！
等下他们那里一天亮我就要马上去质问他们了
现在要忙学会的招生表演、数学测验、BM报告等等等
刚刚去bengkel praktikal脚软回家
我觉得我还是不要驾驶比较好，虽然上手很快，但是我很粗心
天阴下雨，一切烦躁的事情也迎面而来
要挺住呀啊
沉住气的一个一个解决掉切勿毛躁
再怎么糟糕也不会糟到哪里去的
顶多不是丢了一些、少了一些东西而已
总会失而复得的
（尤其是针对大学申请，一直很担忧最糟糕的情况来临，不过何必折磨自己呢。即使最后要transfer，也没很差呀，至少还能和我的狐朋狗友混个一年）
数学测验完毕后就是交响乐团的招生活动
这次有点经验，让组员们上台表演
而我们的booth不需要太花俏 :)
把2月用过的布置再拿出来看看能不能利用
星期二就可以看到A同学啦！
你的笑容是对我最大的鼓舞！
天色暗了，是时候回去做事了……
2014年3月15日星期六
Fell for a friend?
Who is not even considered as a really close friend...
I am always very slow to know my feelings...
And it was one class after that fateful day that I started to see him in a different perspective.
I have zero resistance to people that are more intelligent than me,
And perhaps that day it was his one question that had me falling for him...
Not gonna reveal that question though lol
I like his eyes. And the way he slightly lowers his head when he asked that question was too much for my weak heart...
Didn't reveal much about him here,
but I still find it very mushy...
I'm not used to writing my feelings directly
Maybe it is the weather that makes me a bit abnormal
[ field trip ]
Went for a field trip with my friends for half day and luckily the haze cleared off as if to smoothen outright outing. We visited the Selangor Islamic arts complex and admired some expensive art pieces there...
Sadly all of us were too focused on not getting lost and also finding lunch that we forgot to take some group selfies...
But I guess that isn't important, as long as we had a really good time...
We don't need to show off right.
I am always very slow to know my feelings...
And it was one class after that fateful day that I started to see him in a different perspective.
I have zero resistance to people that are more intelligent than me,
And perhaps that day it was his one question that had me falling for him...
Not gonna reveal that question though lol
I like his eyes. And the way he slightly lowers his head when he asked that question was too much for my weak heart...
Didn't reveal much about him here,
but I still find it very mushy...
I'm not used to writing my feelings directly
Maybe it is the weather that makes me a bit abnormal
[ field trip ]
Went for a field trip with my friends for half day and luckily the haze cleared off as if to smoothen outright outing. We visited the Selangor Islamic arts complex and admired some expensive art pieces there...
Sadly all of us were too focused on not getting lost and also finding lunch that we forgot to take some group selfies...
But I guess that isn't important, as long as we had a really good time...
We don't need to show off right.
2014年3月14日星期五
烟霾，以及迷蒙中的美丽意外
别问我标题是什么意思，就如村上的《世界尽头与冷酷仙境》，其实不过是语感美而已。
今天的烟霾很严重，我已经戴口罩去上课……
在炎热天气下转车到campus，结果吃午饭的时候得知下午的课全取消
我今天本来就是为了一小时的课特地出门的
现在竟然取消掉
API差不多200了吧
话说很多人都把口罩有颜色的一面戴在外
我很疑惑，白色那面是filter，现在你要避环境的污染分子，当然要把白色戴在外头呀！
除非是你生病不想传染其他人，那你就可以把青色那面戴在外
不去理解真正的戴法，戴到窒息最后也只是徒劳
下星期是我们这一batch学生的科目注册日，所以我今天特地跑去找我的adviser预定时间
（注册日之前必须定好和adviser的会面时间，方便她办事）
结果我就撞见A同学了耶
撞见了耶哦呵呵呵呵～
原来我们是在相同adviser之下的（他是社会学系的嘛）
哇如果他今天成功注册了美国政府这个科目，就代表这热门课没有爆满
为了下学期能够上到这个我期待很久的课（也很喜欢那个讲师）
我就预定了下星期最早的注册时间
那么A同学就可以继续当我的同桌哈哈哈
同学你太可爱了，爷欣赏你
今天的烟霾很严重，我已经戴口罩去上课……
在炎热天气下转车到campus，结果吃午饭的时候得知下午的课全取消
我今天本来就是为了一小时的课特地出门的
现在竟然取消掉
API差不多200了吧
话说很多人都把口罩有颜色的一面戴在外
我很疑惑，白色那面是filter，现在你要避环境的污染分子，当然要把白色戴在外头呀！
除非是你生病不想传染其他人，那你就可以把青色那面戴在外
不去理解真正的戴法，戴到窒息最后也只是徒劳
下星期是我们这一batch学生的科目注册日，所以我今天特地跑去找我的adviser预定时间
（注册日之前必须定好和adviser的会面时间，方便她办事）
结果我就撞见A同学了耶
撞见了耶哦呵呵呵呵～
原来我们是在相同adviser之下的（他是社会学系的嘛）
哇如果他今天成功注册了美国政府这个科目，就代表这热门课没有爆满
为了下学期能够上到这个我期待很久的课（也很喜欢那个讲师）
我就预定了下星期最早的注册时间
那么A同学就可以继续当我的同桌哈哈哈
同学你太可爱了，爷欣赏你
2014年3月13日星期四
2014年3月12日星期三
I don't want to look at you anymore
I don't know if it's your arrogance or introvertness.
But you seem very hostile and indifferent.
In the BM class, you are always sticking with your BFF and I found it damn hard to communicate with both of you.
Well, Mabel is better, but when it comes to communication of three, she also leaves me out.
I don't understand the mentality of you guys, so I decided to leave the group of three for our two major assignments.
Which translates as freedom for me and hot water for you.
How funny it is when people do not know their limitations and inabilities and think of themselves as superior.
You guys have attitude problem. Seriously.
And it's less than two weeks from the deadline. I bet you haven't finished the individual assignment too.
I am tired of having to remind you two about the deadline.
And I was so goddamn pissed off today when you responded to my reminder that you thought it is only two people per group?
Oh fck, so you didn't know that I was with your group from the very beginning of this class?
Is my presence so insignificant to you?
Who did the previous presentations?
Who translated the fcking difficult BM passage for you?
Show some respect lah.
Sometimes when you are cordial and kind to everyone around you, you tend to persuade yourself that he or she does not have bad intention/attitude.
But you also have to learn to give people the disrespect that they deserve.
Or else you'll end up with little confidence, thinking that everything that happens is your own fault.
So I made a very strong decision on the spot to find another group mate, and luckily I found this guy that is also trying to find a partner.
His attitude is better and he's responsible.
Happily leaving my ex-groupmates to fck themselves.
Don't come wailing at me when you cannot hand in your work on the duedate.
You'd better change that forever-sulky face of yours or else you are going to end up confined in your small circle and pissing the initially helpful people around you.
Think you're cool? We'll see.
But you seem very hostile and indifferent.
In the BM class, you are always sticking with your BFF and I found it damn hard to communicate with both of you.
Well, Mabel is better, but when it comes to communication of three, she also leaves me out.
I don't understand the mentality of you guys, so I decided to leave the group of three for our two major assignments.
Which translates as freedom for me and hot water for you.
How funny it is when people do not know their limitations and inabilities and think of themselves as superior.
You guys have attitude problem. Seriously.
And it's less than two weeks from the deadline. I bet you haven't finished the individual assignment too.
I am tired of having to remind you two about the deadline.
And I was so goddamn pissed off today when you responded to my reminder that you thought it is only two people per group?
Oh fck, so you didn't know that I was with your group from the very beginning of this class?
Is my presence so insignificant to you?
Who did the previous presentations?
Who translated the fcking difficult BM passage for you?
Show some respect lah.
Sometimes when you are cordial and kind to everyone around you, you tend to persuade yourself that he or she does not have bad intention/attitude.
But you also have to learn to give people the disrespect that they deserve.
Or else you'll end up with little confidence, thinking that everything that happens is your own fault.
So I made a very strong decision on the spot to find another group mate, and luckily I found this guy that is also trying to find a partner.
His attitude is better and he's responsible.
Happily leaving my ex-groupmates to fck themselves.
Don't come wailing at me when you cannot hand in your work on the duedate.
You'd better change that forever-sulky face of yours or else you are going to end up confined in your small circle and pissing the initially helpful people around you.
Think you're cool? We'll see.
2014年3月10日星期一
Pinyin failed again, everything failing, sibeh failed morning
The title is the indicator of author went insane.
Google pinyin failed again...
What I'm doing this whole morning is basically trying to sort how to do a good student discussion.
Shit, why did we choose Syria crisis at the first time?
I can make a pretty informative presentation but discussion is very different.
How are you going to prompt the others to reflect and ask?
That's a problem.
At the same time I need to get familiar with the calculus syllabus.
Whole night yesterday spent on making sense of chapter 3...
Thanks for the help that my uncle has provided...
I'm not good at math and science so I guess I should just stick firmly to social science/ humanities courses.
I don't care how we get the derivatives and calculate all sort of weird graphs, albeit it is important for real world applications.
So lost now. I don't think my members would ever want to consult lecturer on how to generate the class discussion, maybe because of pride?
It's graded and we don't know if asking for help would affect the marks.
But either way we're in hot water too.
The taste of IR is really bitter, but it's a good experience.
At least we emerge as heroic and tragedic fighters, taking the most challenging course with highest fail record in ADP history.
And at leaaaast I am being pushed to investigate and analyze the Syria crisis, something that is not fun at all.
Oil, gas, pipelines. Veto, intervention, failed talks.
Obama, Putin, Assad. Qatar, Turkey, Iran.
Aaaaarggghhhh.
Google pinyin failed again...
What I'm doing this whole morning is basically trying to sort how to do a good student discussion.
Shit, why did we choose Syria crisis at the first time?
I can make a pretty informative presentation but discussion is very different.
How are you going to prompt the others to reflect and ask?
That's a problem.
At the same time I need to get familiar with the calculus syllabus.
Whole night yesterday spent on making sense of chapter 3...
Thanks for the help that my uncle has provided...
I'm not good at math and science so I guess I should just stick firmly to social science/ humanities courses.
I don't care how we get the derivatives and calculate all sort of weird graphs, albeit it is important for real world applications.
So lost now. I don't think my members would ever want to consult lecturer on how to generate the class discussion, maybe because of pride?
It's graded and we don't know if asking for help would affect the marks.
But either way we're in hot water too.
The taste of IR is really bitter, but it's a good experience.
At least we emerge as heroic and tragedic fighters, taking the most challenging course with highest fail record in ADP history.
And at leaaaast I am being pushed to investigate and analyze the Syria crisis, something that is not fun at all.
Oil, gas, pipelines. Veto, intervention, failed talks.
Obama, Putin, Assad. Qatar, Turkey, Iran.
Aaaaarggghhhh.
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